More tranny stories later!
I love black thongs
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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