Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Randomize