I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize
