I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
