I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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