So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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