Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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