are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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