In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
