i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Randomize
