He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
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