she looked like the before picture.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
