dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize