Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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