Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Randomize