she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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