You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
