I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize