wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Randomize
