i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
