Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
are you so shy because you have an std?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
