he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize