And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize