I don't remember. Are we still dating?
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
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