She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
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