Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
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