the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
