Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize