Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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