I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
