That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
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Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
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yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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