i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
Randomize
