I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
what is it with giant penises always finding me
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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