My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize