You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
