just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Randomize
