But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
