I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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