I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
