I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Randomize
