dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize