Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
