its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
