You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Randomize
