I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
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