Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
