did you get engaged???
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
