I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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