I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Randomize
