Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
Is it going to be one of those nights where I shouldn't wear my contacts so everyone looks more attractive?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
