dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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