I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
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